I'm not a SUPER FANTASTIC mom, and that's okay.....

I typically don't write about parenting on here .....well,  because most days I don't think i'm that good of a parent.  I'm hoping that if you read this will realize no parent is perfect, no parent is better than any other parent and as long as you have happy healthy kids you are doing something right! 

Illistration by Al margen 

Illistration by Al margen 

Society tells us what we have to do as parents and it is fucking exhausting! I'm not going to lie trying to keep up with super star parents is something I had to give up a LONG time ago. Now our situation was different because we adopted our three children all at once. Yes one day our kids came to us on our front porch with nothing but some garbage bags and we just had to figure it out. It was hard.... I called my mom for pretty much a whole year telling her "I don't think I can do this". 

Before I was a mom I had these ideas of what kind of mom I wanted to be... yep that was out the window quicker than I could say organic snack and kale kids smoothies. This was actually something I tried I bought my kids organic snacks and made them super delicious smoothies that they basically spit all over the floor. I quickly realized that my kids weren't into them and I was exhausting myself trying to keep up with what I thought I should do as a mom. 

Don't get me wrong i'm not pumping my kids full of mountain dew and potato chips.... well not every day. My daughter Grace actually drank a mountain dew the other day and do you know what, SHE SURVIVED IT and IT WILL ALL BE OKAY...... When we have movie night I give my kids POP, and popcorn and CANDY all before bedtime.... and they LOVE IT and honestly so do I !!!  Its all part of the experience and it something we all do together. 

Movie night

Movie night

We are totally over trying to be "super moms".  I want to be a good mom for my kids but the reality was I can't sit and blow bubbles with my kids all day ( i wish)  and I don't momager them every minute of every day......... I let them fight and fall and sneak snacks, we don't bathe them enough or feed them home made meals everyday, I don't take them to 1000 activities and sports and classes and play dates. and that's okay, they will be just fine. 

I'm also not saying we don't do anything with our children. We do.... but its on our time and we try not to plan every second of every day with experiences and activities. If you are this type of parent and your kids are into it, more power to ya!!!! There is nothing wrong with that and I am not a better or worse parent, just different.

There are so many studies that show you " Don't eat this, don't do this, make sure your child is the cutest, the best behaved, if your child is hyper they have this disorder, if your child is an asshole they have this disorder." I AM OVER IT! I get that catching things early is important but honestly you are that child's parent and sometimes i think these kids are being diagnosed with childhood.

When my wife was young teachers told her mom that she had special needs and her mom( a master of education and teacher for 30 years) stood her ground and stuck up for her child. My wife amber graduated valedictorian of her high school class and is now pursuing her second masters degree and is a college professor. So they were right she was pretty special! 

Three happy kids..... doing nothing but running around getting dirty and eating watermelon 

Three happy kids..... doing nothing but running around getting dirty and eating watermelon 

 

I am in NO WAY a parenting expert but one thing I have learned was to relax and stop giving a hoot about what other people think about me and my family or what others think we should or shouldn't do .....

Hey judgy lady at Denny's (when my kid is not sitting still enough and not talking quietly enough) I DON'T CARE, he is a kid! 

When other parents tell me about all of the SUPER FANTASTIC things they are doing with their kids this summer.... Awesome, have fun, cool... This is what we will be doing ;)

Do I wish I had an assistant and could be a stay at home mom and just do crafts with my kids all day and take them to Disney world every year, oh sure but that's not our life and my kids will be just fine without that because our reality is I work a full time job,  run a full time business and my wife works full time..... We don't have the luxury of doing these things and we aren't going to exhaust everything in our life to do things most of the time our kids don't want to do anyway.  ( they do want to go to Disney.... I hear this every day ha ha) 

 

 also just recently started making my kids do chores and fold and put away their own laundry! And guess what THEY CAN DO IT.... It was eye opening for them just how many outfits they wear and how long laundry takes ( they were in their room for over 2 hours yesterday, but guess what i bet my laundry will decrease after a few weeks of this)...... I would spend HOURS AND HOURS AND HOURS ( LOOK AT THAT PILE IT IS NO JOKE) folding laundry just for my kids to throw it everywhere so I stopped. Kids don't care about folded laundry and I get more time to blow bubbles by not folding it.  They can have their laundry whatever way they want it in their drawer... just give me my laundry baskets back ha ha ha ha ( warning wrinkled clothing from everyone in my house to be expected) 

This is a realistic view of our laundry for 1 WEEK! if i don't do a single load........ OYE!

This is a realistic view of our laundry for 1 WEEK! if i don't do a single load........ OYE!

Every family is different and that's awesome. I think what works for your family is what you should do, all i'm saying is stop comparing yourself to  other parents, stop trying to be super mom and just enjoy your life! 

Here's to a carefree, judge free, worry free summer and keep being the mom YOU want to be not who others want you to be! 

 

XO 

Carrie